Speed Traveler

From Interdex, the community-edited guide to the local internet.

Speed Traveler (also known as spdtrvlr) is a creepy motherfucker who showed up on ABS Forums sometime around 2006. While being mostly just boring, he doesn't have any problems with letting the internet know all about his disgusting fetishes and his nerdy lifestyle. He also jumps on every opportunity to tell the females how cute they are and how much he likes them. When accused of being a creep, his defense is that it was all just a "joke". For some reason hardly anyone on ABS seems to have a problem with any of this.

[edit] Quotes

• I’m a member of an emmawatson fan forum. It is just one big circle jerk; you can’t get in an honest opinion anywhere.

I was active in this forum site called offtopic.com (which is where the peanut butter jelly banana thing originated from); the forum is an even bigger circle jerk than the ew forum. The sex forums were really hot though, members would post naked pictures of themselves and there was a nice amount of women on the forums. I got banned.

I was also an ebaumsworld forum member. I got banned.

There are other forums here and there but I’m not active in them.

• Oh yeah that reminds me I lurk the peachy18 forum.

• On a side-note anyone know of any good websites or chat programs where I can get e-laid (girls showing their boobies on cam in real-time)? And I don’t mean porn sites, I mean real girls with whom I can chat. I tried yahoo chat and it sucks, it’s 50% bots, 35% guys, 10% middle-aged ugly women and that precious 5% of hot girls are too selective and will put you on ignore for any little thing. So if you can help me out I’d appreciate it!

• For old times' sake (and because I was horny) I downloaded yahoo messenger to lurk chat rooms.

I'm pming all the female and gender-ambiguous users with my usual "hi" and "hey". Finally, I get a human response; she's female and living Turkey. I ask for a pic (I am ready with my pics of a male camwhore I found on the internet) and she says no she doesn't have one... but she has a cam. My eyes open wide, my hearts starts to beat quickly, I've never cammed before, could this finally be it? I tell her I have one as well, and we debate over who will show first. I convince her to go first and she quickly complies.

The cam goes on and to my amazement it is - or it seems to be, since you can never be too sure - a woman. She's a thirty-something with glasses and a nice face. Eh, pretty average but jerk-able nonetheless. I never reasoned to show my face. So, I turn off the light and get on cam, flashlight in hand. I unzip and take out my dick and masturbate furiously on cam, somehow I thought she would like this. I look to see her face to see if she is smiling, but no, she is just watching, resting her cheek on her fist. I turn back to lick my hand for lube when out of my peripheral vision I see her cam go dark. "No? You no like?", I say. There's silence, but with hope I IM her again... nothing. I turn off my cam and masturbate alone in the dark. The End.

• So, two girls one cup, y'all seen it? It's that scat sex video... Seriously, I love the way she relieves herself. It's so fast and quite voluminous. It looks like it felt amazing. Anyone else like that part, or am I not on the right forum to be talking about this?

• I have the hots for my female second cousin, I think that's distant enough.

• referring to previous quote: I’ve never actually talked to her and she doesn’t even know I exist. I only saw her once when our family was invited to her sweet 16 and that was like 4 years ago so she’s around my age I suspect. She had a tight little ass on her and she danced so cute with her boyfriend during the reception. So I was just sitting at the table watching her greedily during the whole thing.

• So anyone know why the member pics thread was closed? Seemed like a good thread.

• quoting a gif of dogs humping and then vomiting: There's a human version of this, what's funny is that almost the exact same thing happens except that she was giving him a lap dance. But the throw-up is the same color. I don't know if I should post the link though.

• This would have been a better thread if it was about posting where we live. Sure it's on our profiles but we could've elaborated on it, like describing our daily lives, etc. I’d actually like to know that stuff, being a stalker in training I find it very interesting to know what bus you take to school.

• Hey man I was just deluded by religion. But aside from that I'm still a dork yeah.

• It's a good thing though wouldn't you say? This place is not a domicile for just nerds anymore. I credit AOL and recently MySpace and youtube with showing girls the vastness of the internet. With this, we have something akin to White Flight in the US but this being a Nerd Flight. No one knows where the nerds are hiding; maybe the concept of the 80s and 90s computer nerd is obsolete in these times. Hail to the goti’s for making the internet not such a barren place anymore.

• Quoting a picture of c_nt: Woah hottsie tottsie B)

• I've been to 12chan, WTF! There are pedophiles there, like they have their own section in the imageboard for pictures of little boys and girls. f**k all the chans.

• speaking to deathbydentalfloss: I’ll manage it. And if you see me as your organ transplant f**k buddy, I’ll do it all. But I ask that you leave me with one eye to fill it with your beauty, one hand to caress your face, one ear to hear your soft voice sing, one nostril to smell your sweet scent as you pass me by, lying on my back upon this killing floor (Zeppelin ftw), and one tongue… wait… and half a tongue to taste what you offer of your body.

• I turned 21 this year, still no beer or cigarettes.

• I had the "It's a piece of cake to bake a pretty cake" verse as my windows startup sound a while back.

• Quoting a picture of BohemianSavant: I'd cum on her purty face.

• So, if any of y'all are visiting New York sometime, you can crash on the couch at my place. For the girls, I'll take the couch and you can have the bed, just don't bleed on it...

never mind you can bleed on it.

• Thumbnail gallery posts are the greatest porn websites, especially those focusing on particular sex acts or fetishes, like facials and creampies.

• Yeah, facial hair on a female is unsettling. That fuzzy, furry arm hair, on the other hand, is kind of cute.

• Get girls to get naked on cam. It helps. Really, I got this girl naked (she claimed to be a stripper, so she was incredibly easy. I basically said show me your boobs and she complied.) and after that I didn't need porn for about a week.

• After someone made a comment about chicks on stickam: Once you miss your window, it just feels awkward to get sexual. I one time ended discussing graduate research opportunities with this girl. It sucked because she was phenomenally hot. I couldn’t just say: “Hmm, very interesting, now, cock for tits?”

Take the no bullshit approach. You go in fast and hard, bro. Make a lascivious compliment at the beginning and this will pretty much state your intention for talking to her. Then it’s her choice whether to block your ass or play along."

• In a thread on porn: Money shot just with the volume on mute for various reasons. Some of my fav sites are jizzonline and spermshack

Yeah. I like to see the pussy disgustingly wet or creamy and convulsing upon orgasm. Live webcams are best if you're into this because the girl has time not to fake it.